Me...not so much. I wore the only orange in my wardrobe and consumed enough sugar to kill a busload of diabetics. Maybe later I'll hold a seance for my sex life. Good enough.
You kids have fun.
Stupid made easy
Tommy Lee and Helen Damnation, circa 2003
It's not the fact that I bought a camel-colored argyle cardigan for work, though...that could be at least partially explained away. Gotta pay the bills, right? No, that's not the problem. The real issue is the fact that I actually like this here cardigan. When I saw it in the store, I wanted it immediately and was tremendously excited when they had it in my size. But you can't blame me, really...I mean come on, it's Italian silk and cashmere, and it's so soft, and...
Yeah, wow, fuck. My days of partying with rock stars are most assuredly over. If it weren't for the fact that my tits are still fairly fantastic, I'd look just like my grandpa in this damned sweater. It's only a matter of time and gravity before people start calling me "sir" and giving up their seats on the subway for the old dude.
Helen Damnation, projected age progression, circa 2015
Cross your fingers that the court does the right thing. It is Jersey, after all.
UPDATE, 4:16 PM EDT: Holy crap, it did! HOT!
Hi Cool Babe,As an added bonus, here's the photo from my new lovah's profile...
Hope this email finds you in good health, I come across your Profile In This Site And I Have interest In You beside your picture attracted me a lot and i deem it very very necessary to get in touch with you for a long-lasting relationship. beside My name is Remmy 32yrs old male, has decent hobbies like Tour, Music,reading, swimmimg and travelling and i desires to make long-lasting friendship with you. Do you think age, colour or distance is any bar to make such friendly relationship with you? If not, then stretch your hand to me and accept mine. i believe this enchanting relation will certainly bring the pleasure in our life for unlimited time. on the contrary, I hope to find that special person in you, and someone with whom I can create the real relation I’ve always wanted, If you feel like we will be friends fine and please mail me back so that I will forward you my photos and Introduce myself to you more, So from there we will get to know each other very well .Mail me with this email address (redacted, because even I'm not THAT mean) There is only one happiness in life,to love and be loved.
I will always remain yours in love.
Big Kisess And Huggs! .
It took me a moment to fully register this awestriking synchronicity, and then pull my gaze away so as not to appear a boob-starer. (I totally am a boob-starer, by the way; I just didn't want Miss Pissy-Face to know that.) I giggled to myself, suddenly feeling less alone. What a timely reminder that either a) there are others out there like me and I'm not a total freak, or b) everyone in the world really DOES read my blog, and they all want to be me! Either way, I was deeply pleased.
She turned to face the tracks. My gaze, unable to help itself, drifted back to her.That's when I noticed that she was pregnant.
Everything else is crap.Have a lovely fucking day.