Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Johnny Updates, Giraffes, and a Whore

Well kids...Miss Damnation spent most of the weekend in bed, sick as a dawg (feel free to send OJ, green tea, and DVD porn.) I logged in yesterday morning hoping to find numerous reports of Johnny Depp sightings around the city and/or news that the Do it for Johnny auctions on eBay had raked in a bazillion dollars...but no such luck, on either front. My blog took more hits than Whitney Houston when Bobby's on a bender, but no reports of direct John-tact. And sadly, all three of the auctions stalled out short of the reserve prices. Sigh...

All is not lost, however...CBass came through, as always...she apparently had a conversation with a lovely waitress from PJ Clarke's over the weekend, who reported that the elusive Gilbert Grape shows up there pretty regular-like. You can bet that I'll be checking that joint out, and I encourage you to do the same. (For Johnny...Do it for Johnny...) And the auctions have been re-opened on eBay with no reserve price, so those of us with jack crapola to offer in the cash department may now participate (and hopefully drive up the bidding so that Haylar and Darcy make enough money to continue with the documentary.) And, this just in...H & D will be on Denver's own 9 News tomorrow morning at 10 AM MST, talking about the project and displaying the Depp guitar. Tune in, my D-town homies!
This WILL happen...oh yes, it will. It's just a matter of when...

In other news, The Giraffes are fucking back and cheaper than ever...free, actually...this Thursday, February 3, at 7:30 PM at the Luna Lounge. I recommend getting there early so you can get close enough for Aaron to spit something on you. I'm working on ideas for the perfect post-myocardial infarction gift for little Gurn...your ideas welcome (and clearly, the wronger the better. wait...is "wronger" a word? hmmm...is now, bitchez.)

And last but nowhere vaguely resembling least...Happy Still-in-your-Twenties Birthday to the Lovely and Talented Charles, Princess of PR, Champeen of All Things That Are in Fact or May Possibly Be Even the Slightest Bit Gay, and One Snappy Fuckin' Dresser to Boot! Helen hearts you. (Whore.)

3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Um, "Sweep the leg Johnny!"

Take his ass out then nurse him back to health on your couch and he'll do anything you want? It must be the pain meds for my tooth talking. Do you have TP?

5:29 PM  
Blogger Faggy Maggy said...

Hello Miss Damn,

It's Ms. Maggy. I've been following what's been down with Hayler. I only met him once but I remember he has been working for this for many years. I truly hope this works out for him.

I'm over my prostate infection... which was rather shitty. At the age of 34, I finally stood up to my parents and family about the gay. I'm officially liberated. Emotionally, I can finally move on to bigger and better things.

Faggy Maggy misses Helen... out.

6:43 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ah man, I totally missed this day of! I blame hair-trigger fingered boys wacked on crack and I dedicate today's pair of B-rude hosiery to you. You rock my jock! -Charles

2:13 PM  

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