Friday, August 11, 2006

It's written in the stars

Dear Helen,
Here is your horoscope for Friday, August 11...

"Some people think you're only about fun and games, but they simply don't realize that all your clowning has a much higher purpose. That includes finding ways to please yourself and help others. "

It's totally true. I know I you feel better knowing that there's someone out there way, WAY more retarded than you. And I laugh while I masturbate.

You're welcome.


Blogger Big Daddy said...

Masturbation is the new pink.

2:56 PM  
Blogger Helen the Felon said... if masturbation is the new pink, and Pink is the New Blog, it follows logically that Masturbation is the New Blog.

Thing is, blogging at work is passable. Masturbation...not so much. Guess I'll have to learn to be quiet about it.

3:23 PM  
Blogger Peter said...

I'm a sagitarius and I never laugh rubbing one out, even at work.

5:22 PM  
Blogger GayProf said...

If you laugh while during masturbation, I don't think that you are doing it right. I am not sayin', I am just sayin'.

5:28 PM  
Blogger Shan said...

As soon as I read your horoscope I just knew you were going to have a bit about masturbation :D

Am sure you can figure out how to get away with it at work. You're a smart woman. Maybe you should explore that - more fodder for the blog perhaps?

8:11 PM  
Blogger Shan said...

And I totally forgot to ask - If masturbation is the new pink, what's the new black?

8:15 PM  
Blogger Big Daddy said...

Passive Aggressive Fear is the New Black.

5:38 PM  
Blogger Da Nator said...

You know what would make me happy? To find out what that fershlugginer secret photo project you were going on about is, that's what!

8:30 PM  
Blogger Sudiegirl said...

Ah - such uplifting advice. Enjoy the self-flagellation...

4:12 PM  

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