Monday, July 24, 2006

Catch-23

I don't know what pisses me off more...the fact that we've created a culture in which the prevalence of celebutarded female body images in the media has necessitated the existence of size 00 pants...


...or the fact that I can't fit my sloppy American ass into them.


Anorexia: It's what's for dinner.

11 Comments:

Blogger Shan said...

Then again Posh is a Pommy and that should explain a multitude of sins. Hope that makes you feel a bit better about your American ass.

7:32 PM  
Blogger Peter said...

Just think of the poor women who have labored their whole lives to squeeze into a size one but will never, no matter what they do, make it to zero.

tragic really

12:21 AM  
Blogger GayProf said...

I don't really have anything funny to say; however, I never understood women's clothes sizes. Men's clothes are based on, you know, actual measurements (e.g., waist 30 inches, inseam 30 inches). It seems to me that the whole random "Size 0-12" is just another way to keep you women folk down -- and perhaps a means to confuse aspiring drag queens.

11:39 AM  
Blogger Da Nator said...

Hey, at least you don't need to replace your real boobies with fake ones because you wasted them away.

HATE.

2:14 PM  
Blogger Helen the Felon said...

Shan: What the hell's a Pommy? Is that anything like a plonker?

Peter: I'm starting a charitable foundation to assist victims like these...can I count on your donation? Thanks so very, very much.

GP: That's only partially true...I mean, what does "42 long" mean, in terms of a guy's suit size? That makes no damn sense either. Bottom line: Marketing is evil.

Nator: Not yet, anyway. At least now I have a goal.

2:59 PM  
Blogger Big Daddy said...

'W' magazine recently had an interesting article that talks about how a lot of celebs are now using 'Elvis doctors' to get Rx's for Adderal.

I guess, it suppresses your appetite and gives you energy, but doesn't have the same effect as meth.

But yah, this celebrity thinorexia is getting out of hand.

4:53 PM  
Blogger Shan said...

Hehehehe Hi Helen - A Pommy, Pommie or just Pom is cheeky and somewhat innapropriate slang for a citizen of the United Kingdom.

Example in a sentence : You pommy git :D

A Plonker is a jerk/idiot. Another good word that sends me into stitches is Pillock - same meaning as plonker.

But I love British people. I have a lot of English friends. International understanding and all that rot, what.

*grins before ducking and running for cover*

3:35 AM  
Blogger Helen the Felon said...

Thanks Shan! You've brought me one step closer to my goal of insulting people in all languages and dialects throughout the world.

9:47 AM  
Blogger missbhavens said...

Oh. My. God. "00" ? Seriously?

That's just crazy...because we all know that major clotihng chains downsize all their numbers to make women feel better about themselves. Let's take The Gap as an example...their size 2 jeans are really more like a traditional 4/6...so that would mean that their "00" would be more like a 2...what's a woman with 23 inch waist to do?

The Gap: First Chain Store To Use Negative Sizing.

The whole thing disgusts me and that Posh looks like a sickly crane.

5:46 PM  
Blogger Daniel, the Guy in the Desert said...

And you can tell from the look on her face that she thinks she's hot. that, or she's on a really wild designer drug cocktail.

8:31 PM  
Blogger Helen the Felon said...

She DOES look like a sickly crane, and she DOES think she's hot. But I guess if I was pushing out David Beckham's babies, I'd think I was hot too. I blame him for this. Becks, quit humping scary boobs on a stick! And hey, call me...

9:31 AM  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home

Who Links Here