Monday, May 15, 2006

Helen does Home Improvement

While demolishing walls in my old loft (again) this weekend, I made an important discovery. Pay attention, ladies.

A balconette bra, such as this one...

...is completely and totally unsuitable for manual labor that involves any amount of bending and/or heavy lifting. Hoo boy. There were just boobs all over the damn place. But, you know, not in a good way.

In spite of my hyperactive titties, though, I managed to move a few hundred pounds of sheetrock out of the loft without hurting myself (much), and only broke one nail in the process. I am woman, bitches.

I so can't wait for this move to be over.

9 Comments:

Anonymous Anna said...

You know what other bras aren't good for sweaty manual labor?

Lace ones. Or partially lace ones.

Damn things itch like CRAZY when they get sweaty.

4:04 PM  
Blogger Da Nator said...

"Balconette"...?

Hey, just use duct tape. That'll stabilize 'em.

4:40 PM  
Blogger Limecrete said...

Hyperactive Titties is going on my band name list. Who wouldn't go to see that show?

4:49 PM  
Blogger Big Dan said...

Yeah, I don't think I own a balconette bra. I prefer sports bras to keep yard dogs in line.

5:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Balconettes, while attractive, do lack in the support dept. And especially around a certain time of the month. The "spillage" effect is such fun!

Lachlan

1:09 PM  
Blogger GayProf said...

You need to give Jane Russell a call and see if she can hook you up with one of those 18-hour- cross-your-heart deals. I am just saying.

1:28 PM  
Blogger DMo said...

When it comes to "boobs all over the place," is there really a bad way?

I would argue no.

2:14 PM  
Blogger Shan said...

Girl: Did you just say "jubble"? That can't be a real word.

Guy: It's like, silent onomatopoeia.

Girl: There's no such thing as silent onomatopoeia. The very definition of the word "onomatopoeia" contradicts silence.

Guy: Well, it's like the sound that boobs would make if they made sound. They'd go "jubble, jubble, jubble."

Girl: I'm afraid I'm going to have to smack you now. Seriously.

6:56 PM  
Blogger dusty said...

Thanks for the tip o wise one..I would think a sports bra would do the trick..but thats just moi.

11:05 AM  

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