Thursday, April 20, 2006

Looking good = feeling good

It's hard to feel "professional" (whatever the fuck that means) when three toes are sticking out of the giant hole in your sock, the hem of your pants is held up with scotch tape, and you're holding an ice cube on your tongue because you burned it all to hell with your morning coffee.

I will never, ever get promoted. Ever. I may as well start showing up drunk. Again.


Anonymous js said...

Come back to Colorado and people will think you are overdressed.

11:46 AM  
Blogger MEK the Bear said...

Now just surf for internet porn while your drunk at work and then you can guarantee getting fired. Then you can collect unemployment and live off the company for another few months before you have to go back to work again... hmmmm... where's my vodka bottle?

12:35 PM  
Blogger Tom said...

A wardrobe change could solve all your problems -- except the sore tongue. Run out right now and don't come back until you're wearing a hot little dress and open-toed shoes. Say you're going to a sample sale -- it's an excused absence at any company in Manhattan and shows what a career-minded, hard-nosed New Yorker you really are.

1:29 PM  
Blogger GayProf said...

Was that recklessly hot
coffee served at work? If so, I smell a lawsuit.

2:59 PM  
Blogger Big Dan said...

Do what I do. Bang the boss. He ain't even cute!

3:18 PM  
Blogger Da Nator said...

But you've got flair!

3:57 PM  
Blogger Big Daddy said...

If you walked around shoeless, or even just one shoe, put the scotch tape on the outside of the hem, you definitely would have flair.

Then you could say you are starting a new trend in fashion, and talk down to people if they question your forward thinking fashion sense.

8:29 PM  
Anonymous js said...

I think scotch tape on the outside might be the start of a real fashion trend. But then again I am also expecting clown clothes to become fashionable any day, so I might not be the best judge.

12:13 PM  

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