It ain't easy
Things It's Really, Really Hard to Do Now That I Have a Boyfriend...I mean, iPod:
*NOT bust into spazmo dance moves on the bus with Junior Senior.
*NOT sing harmonies (so, SO badly) in public with New Professionals.
*NOT mosh assholes on the subway, inspired by the Giraffes.
*NOT bust along with Chuck D. (I know how white I am, believe me.)
*NOT walk like Axl Rose during Paradise City.
*Wipe the retarded smile off my face.
*Put the goddamn thing down, even for a second.
*Stop running up my credit card bill buying song upon song.
*Hide the fact that I love Kelly Clarkson. There, I said it. Fuck you.
*NOT bust into spazmo dance moves on the bus with Junior Senior.
*NOT sing harmonies (so, SO badly) in public with New Professionals.
*NOT mosh assholes on the subway, inspired by the Giraffes.
*NOT bust along with Chuck D. (I know how white I am, believe me.)
*NOT walk like Axl Rose during Paradise City.
*Wipe the retarded smile off my face.
*Put the goddamn thing down, even for a second.
*Stop running up my credit card bill buying song upon song.
*Hide the fact that I love Kelly Clarkson. There, I said it. Fuck you.
posted by Helen the Felon at 6:13 PM
4 Comments:
iPod changed my life. I bow in deferrence to it. I even made a little altar for it. It is the boss of me.
For my birthday by best friend, at a loss for a gift, broke our "no gift certificates" policy and put $$$ in my iTunes account. She doesn't have an iPod and doesn't believe me when I say that it's THE BEST GIFT EVER and to do it all the time!
Ask everyone you know for $10 in your iAccount for x-mas and you'll be set for awhile!
I think the shuffle feature on my iPod has given me more orgasms than any man I have ever known!!
And you love Kelly Clarkson too? I always knew you were a gay man! :)
i love kelly too. and if lovin her is wrong, i sure as hell don't wanna be right.
I don't have an iPod yet, but something tells me I'd be a charter member of the rhythmless white people's nation, no doubt.
I'd be doing the seat dance if I were on the Metro.
I'd be attempting to moonwalk if I went outside to walk for my health.
In short, I'd look like the dorkiest dork that ever shopped at K-Mart.
Sudiegirl
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