It's getting to the point...

Where I'm no fun anymore.
I am sorry.

To make up for it, here is some information you might find very useful. This is a lesson I learned shortly after my surgery this summer, when I was sick to the point that I could no longer ingest necessary medications orally:

Suppositories go up your butt!

Yeah.

I learned this by examining the instruction label on a package of suppositories very, very carefully. Even though I can't actually read, the illustrations are so helpful that I was able to figure it out and use the medication properly...

And that, my friends, is the very definition of awesome.

Then, just when you thought it couldn't get one bit better...

I'd like to state for the record that, since breaking up with my last ex, I actually only have one rectum, and thus found it necessary to use just one suppository at a time. But hey, that's just me. No matter how many rectums you personally have, you're still okay.

I hope you find these marvellously detailed directions as helpful as I did. I am nothing if not a helper.