Maybe THIS will help with my boo-hooing...

Ah, the intervention of fate...or just some silly bullshit that made me giggle for a second.
Whatever. I'll take it.

Dear Helen,
Here is your horoscope for Friday, November 12:
Okay, so you've never exactly been the soul of willpower. You've always believed that if one is good, two is better and many, many more would be just great. That's going to go double for several weeks, starting now. Better hire a chaperone.

Volunteers?
No, didn't think so. I hope you're smarter than that...